dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
