I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
