just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
