Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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