people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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