I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
