Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
