There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
