i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I love you. Go after that dick
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