that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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