Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Randomize
