I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
