Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
