I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
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