You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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