He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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