I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
