Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
