just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
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