Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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