He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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