i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
And then my night got REAL pukey
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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