I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
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