I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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