If i come over, it means nothing
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
My feet surprised me
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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