is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Blood and glitter go together right?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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