I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
