i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
