found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
