We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
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