And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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