Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
