playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
