I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
