bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
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