I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
