The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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