I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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