you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
