hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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