maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
birth control should be required to get into college
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
