officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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