why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
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