I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
