Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
