Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
