I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
