I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
