It's Friday. Sex?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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