we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
